Trust moves people. Said another way, people don’t move until they trust you.
 
At the end of July, I attended a camp for 150 teenage girls as a youth leader. My job was to manage the ropes course, meaning I strapped myself to a belaying rope and supported girls as they climbed 25-foot walls, sometimes cheering them on and more often than not literally hauling them up the wall.
 
Time and again these girls would approach the wall, attach their harness to the rope, and start climbing without ever asking me for any credentials, expertise, or past experience. Did they know I had just learned how to belay someone 5 minutes earlier? Probably not. But they didn’t need my resume or list of accomplishments because something else existed – inherent trust.
 
I firmly believe that if we truly understood the power of trust we would do NOTHING during the first few weeks of the year but build trust. Literally every meeting, every class, and every interaction would be focused on trust-building.
 
The reality is nothing gets done without it. It’s a currency. Just like you can’t walk into Chipotle and demand a burrito, you can’t walk into a team meeting or classroom where trust doesn’t exist and demand results. You also can’t walk into Chipotle and coerce, influence, or manipulate the cashier into giving you a burrito and expect to get it. You pay money and you get the result you desire every single time.
 
Likewise, your class or team isn’t a group of people to be coerced, influenced, or manipulated. They want to be bought. And the price they’re asking is high. They want you to buy their effort with trust and lots of it. They want to trust that you have their best interest in mind, trust that you will develop them, trust that you will advocate for them, and trust that you won’t let them down. They want to trust that they can be who they are and that will be acceptable. They want to trust you and the team with their failures, anxieties, doubts, and fears. We all want to trust others and feel trusted in return.
 
The more I train and coach leaders from all backgrounds, the more I realize that leadership is all about trust. The majority of dysfunction in leadership comes from a lack of trust with the people you lead.
 
Awhile back I was coaching a leader who was trying too hard. He overcompensated and began to rub his colleagues wrong. He would try too hard to come across as confident and bold in team meetings and with the teachers he evaluated. The result was lost influence with his team, mistrust with the teachers he evaluated, and a loss of confidence for him. What was the foundation of his dysfunctional behavior?
 
Trust.
 
As we dug in, it became clear that he behaved the way he did because he was afraid that people wouldn't see him as equal to the task, as good enough to be in the position he was in. And why was he afraid, because he didn't trust that his teammates and teachers would respect him if he was simply himself.
 
Did you catch it? It was a trust thing.
 
Why don't people speak up? Or delegate? Or engage in healthy conflict? Or work together as a team?
 
Trust.

When your team members or students feels trust, they do this (from Lencioni, P. (2011). Team assessment report. The Table Group, Inc.):
 

• Acknowledge their weaknesses to one another.
• Ask for help without hesitation.
• Ask one another for input regarding their areas of responsibility.
• Acknowledge and tap into one another’s skills and expertise.
• Willingly apologize to one another.
• Are unguarded and genuine with one another.
• Can comfortably discuss their personal lives with one another.

 
So how do you know if your class or team has trust? Easy. Are they doing the things above? If not, you may want to back up and build trust. Here’s how:

1. Be vulnerable – It seems counterintuitive, but the best way to build trust is to show you aren’t perfect. The key is to be strategic. Not all audiences need to hear all weaknesses, fears, struggles, doubts, heart-wrenching stories, or even all aspects of who you are, where you come from, and why you’re here. Choose what to share with whom, always remaining true to yourself. But push yourself to be a little vulnerable and watch the trust skyrocket. By the way, stories of success and happiness can feel equally as vulnerable as stories of failure, and they build trust as well.
2. Build character – Walk the talk. Simply live with integrity. Be the same person in the dark as you are in the light, from meeting to meeting, class to class, and home to work. And genuinely care about people. The most trustworthy people aren’t in it for themselves.
3. Build competence – Know what to do and how to get it done. Know enough about the technical side of your job to guide others. Learn strategies for putting your knowledge to work and share those strategies with others. And navigate the relationships in your school with adeptness.

 
The greatest investment you can make as a leader is to develop a tremendous amount of trust as quickly as possible. Contrary to what most people believe, trust isn't only built over time and by getting results. This certainly helps. But trust can come from showing vulnerability, truly understanding one another, and investing in human relationships.
 
The great Warren Buffett said, “Trust is like the air we breathe. When it’s present, nobody notices. When it’s absent, everybody notices.” The only way over the wall is to trust.

I've learned an important truth over the past few years of coaching individuals in career and leadership -- they don't want to hear my story, they want to hear their own reflected back to them.

The key to effective coaching is to listen and reflect back to people the important truths in their story they might otherwise miss. In order to do this, you've got to listen at a Level II and Level III.

Level I listening is, simply, listening through your own lens.

It includes listening to your own thoughts, interpretations, and emotions related to another's story and projecting those on the person you are listening to. It sounds like:

• "I can totally relate. Once, a few years back, I..."
• "I know what you mean. I've felt that too. Awhile ago I..."

Level I may sound like empathy, but it's really digesting someone else's story through your own experience. The center of this kind of listening is you.

Level II listening is investing in the other's experience, making them the center of the universe.

It's listening to how they feel, what their interpretations are of their own experiences, and mirroring that back to the person you're listening to. It sounds like:

• "That sounds really difficult. How did you feel when that happened?"
• "It sounds like you were pretty discouraged..."
• "What do you think that meant?"
• "I hear you saying that this experiences was more eye-opening than anything..."

Level II listening is all about the other.

Level III listening is global listening.

It includes listening for everything that's not being said. You use your senses to seek out and identify the energy in the room and what's happening at a meta-level. In this type of listening, you and the individual stand side-by-side, "above" the room, and analyze everything in the universe that's intangible but there. It sounds like:

• "I hear you saying that was hard. I also noticed that the energy shifted when you talked about that..."
• "You mentioned you're excited but your mood shifted when you started talking about it..."
• "What you're saying makes sense, but I also remember awhile ago that you said you wanted to change your focus. This feels different than what you said back then..."

Great coaches live in Levels II and III.

TRY IT!

Want to become a better listener? Try these two activities:

1. In the next conversation you have TODAY, listen at Level II by paying attention to the words the other person says and reflect back to them what you hear them saying. For example:

You: "How did your class go?"
Them: "It was ok."
You: "Why just ok? You don't seem excited about it."
Them: "Yeah. This activity I planned fell totally flat and three kids in the back were disengaged."
You: "What do you think caused it? What was different?"
Them: "I think that...blah blah blah..."

Listening at Level II means walking the other person through their own experience and reflecting back what you hear.

2. Observe Level III. In your next team meeting, lunch or bus duty, or check-in, pay attention to what's happening globally.

Make note of the moods you observe, the non-verbals, the emotions people project into the world, and what's not being said. Want to do this at ninja-level? Have someone else do this with you and compare your notes afterward. The best way to build your Level III listening is through deliberate practice.

​Want to learn more? Check out Co-Active Coaching, a pretty solid read about coaching like a boss.

Want to be trained in coaching? Let's talk. I regularly train individuals one-on-one and in large-group settings to be stronger coaches.

Most of the people I coach who can't stand meetings and check-ins avoid them for the same reason: they've never been in a good one. I tend to avoid meetings at all costs as well, and yet I've been in some great, inspiring, and effective meetings.

Meetings and check-ins are where the work of leadership gets done. Individual work happens outside of meetings, but the most important things happen when two or more people come together to combine their collective experience, effort, and perspective to create a better solution than what could have been achieved in isolation. Meetings, whether formal or informal, have great potential for effectiveness if done right.

They're also expensive to hold, so it's important we get them right. The cost, per hour, of a meeting of seven leaders making $100k each is $364.58.

​That's a high-priced hour.

Below is a structure for meetings that lends itself to great outcomes and maximizes bang-for-buck:

Pre-Meeting
Before the meeting, get clear about it's purpose. Why is it happening? Even if it's a regular meeting, each one should have a unique, explicit purpose. Based on that purpose, is there any pre-work that needs to be accomplished to maximize the time? Even if the request is "come having thought about ______," pre-work leads to effective use of time.

Email the team or individual ahead of time to state the purpose for the gathering so they are prepared to participate and stay on point. People hate meetings when they don't understand the "why."

Here's some verbiage you might use:

"Hi Team,

I'm looking forward to meeting on Wednesday. The outcome for out meeting will be to... My request is that you come prepared to... Below is a simple agenda we'll use to guide the flow.

{Insert Agenda subheads only}

See you soon.

Sincerely,

{Your name here}"

Once you've communicated the purpose (which takes all of 5 minutes to send out), create the agenda. Below is a sample agenda with descriptions of each component. A meeting without a plan is a meeting primed for distraction, wandering, and ineffectiveness.

Effective Meeting Structure
Outcomes of Meeting: The goal of our meeting today is...(e.g. to collect feedback, etc.) -- State this at the top of the agenda and say it explicitly at the outset.

Agenda:

• Teambuilder -- Start with a simple question that builds trust and team; bonus points if it aligns with the outcome of the meeting. For example, if the meeting will be focused on brainstorming an upcoming event, the teambuilder might be, "What's the worst event you ever hosted? Why?" Other generic questions that build trust:
  • What's most stressful for you right now?
  • What's the best thing you worked on in the past week?
  • What aspect of your values/talents/personality has been most activated in the past week?
• Updates (short) -- No more than 60 seconds per person; each should share what's top-of-mind in their area
• Cascading Messages from senior leaders -- What updates need to be shared from the top? Putting this at the top emphasizes the importance of transparency and communication
• Collaboration Topics* -- This is the meat. Spend the majority of the meeting here. If the meeting is an hour, spend 45 minutes collaborating. Why else would we meet if not to tap the expertise in the room?! Below are the four types of things you may cover in a meeting/check-in:
  • Decisions to make -- Review the facts and circumstances and make a decision together
  • Action plans to create -- Identify the next steps of an event or other project and delegate
  • Ideas to generate -- Ideate as a group to generate solutions
  • Feedback to provide -- Collect insights about initiatives or other topics
• Close Out -- Review the initial outcome of the meeting and summarize what action was taken.
• Review Action Items -- Review "who is doing what, by when, and how you will know when it's done."
• Scheduling -- Plan the next meeting, and any other meetings that need to occur to move along the action items.

*What makes a great collaboration topic?

1. Relevant to the entire team
2. The synergy of all of the minds in the room would add tremendous value to developing a solution
3. Future-oriented and/or contributes to growth and progress toward the mission/purpose of the team or organization

Post-Meeting
Follow-up immediately after the meeting with an email containing the agenda and a list of action items. In the next meeting you have, you can use these action items as a launch point for accountability and revisit them at the beginning of the agenda.

Also reiterate the date of the next meeting and send a calendar invite if appropriate.

A few keys to remember:

1. Send the agenda out early to appeal to the introverts who may appreciate the time to process
2. Set expectations when you send out the email of things you expect the participants to come to the meeting with (e.g. come having thought through the one thing about X you most connect with and the one question you have)
3. Establish roles in the meeting and rotate these each time (one note taker that records action items throughout the meeting and sends them to you at the end to distribute to the team, one timekeeper that keeps you on task so you don't spend too long on any one item, one facilitator to run the agenda)
4. Your role is to mine conflict and encourage it when you hear it. Remember, conflict leads to the best ideas emerging!

Meet for no less than 30 minutes and no more than 90 minutes, no less often than once a month and probably no more often than bi-weekly. Perhaps for check-ins you may want to meet weekly. And, for sanity's sake, if there's nothing to talk about cancel the meeting!

If you want to take meetings to ninja level, you can also plan for the processes you'll engage during the meeting (pair and share, individual brainstorm, small group work, etc.) but this is for a future post.

​If you lead or manage, you meet (for better or for worse). Do it right and get better results, higher engagement, and a future blog post from someone who attended your meeting years earlier and loved it!

A few weeks back a client asked me a question I'd never really considered. He asked me how to praise his teachers and make it stick. See, his staff is the humble kind that might appreciate the praise but not internalize how amazing they actually are. How do you make it hit harder?

Anyone can praise, but only great managers do it in a way that hits to the core.

Below are four simple rules to follow:

1. Break the norm.
2. Do it one-on-one.
3. Specific and outcome-based.
4. Tie it to a reward.

​1. Break the norm.
When do you expect to be praised and by whom? Typically, you can see praise coming from your manager or peers, and usually as part of "shout-outs" at a team meeting or in a check-in. You might expect some praise after an observation or after submitting a deliverable. The key to breaking the norm is to deliver the praise when it's least expected and, perhaps, from a source they wouldn't normally get it from.

For example, how might a teacher feel who normally receives praise from their direct manager or peers if the Principal shows up in their classroom unexpectedly to deliver praise? Or what if a dean who normally gets praise from a school leader receives a note from a student or teacher? Praise outside the norm for more impact.

2. Do it one-on-one.
Group praise is good. One-on-one praise is better. Nothing elevates praise like getting it one-on-one, eye-to-eye, from someone you respect. Why?

When I receive praise as part of a team or a group, I'm more likely to assume the praise is meant for someone else or that my part was smaller than perhaps it actually was in achieving the success. One-on-one praise makes it crystal clear.

3. Specific and outcome-based.
"Great job" is the enemy of effective praise. "Great job" for what exactly? And what made it "great?" Powerful praise identifies:

• Specifically what the person did or how they are
• What the impact of their behavior was

If any part of this is missing, the praise lacks impact.

Bad example: "Great job in the meeting today."
Great example: "Nice job summarizing those data points in the team meeting today. I thought you nailed it. You covered all of the key points but made the summaries relatable. Good job."

4. Tie it to a reward.
Ever heard of the Five Love Languages? Don't bail on me yet. The concept is simple but powerful: people appreciate being rewarded in a specific way, and yet we all have the tendency to reward others in the way WE like to be rewarded. The five ways are:

• Words of affirmation
• Quality time
• Acts of service
• Gifts
• Physical Touch

Praising verbally is one thing, and will meet the needs of the sliver of staff who thrive on "words of affirmation." But tying verbal praise to a reward takes it to ninja-level.

Does your staff member appreciate quality time? Take them to coffee. Acts of service? Stand in for them in a meeting or teach their class so they can do something else. Gifts? This one's easy -- a gift card or something more meaningful like a framed picture of the team with handwritten notes can go a long way. Even physical touch can be done by combining the verbal praise with a high-five, pat on the back, or fist bump.

Oh, and how do you know which one they prefer? Ask them. Better yet, make it a teambuilder at your next team meeting:

"What is your preferred reward and why?"

​Praise can be a game-changer for boosting morale and performance. If you're going to do it, might as well make it stick.

A few years ago, I started a new job, pumped to contribute. I got my slacks dry-cleaned, ironed my button-up and showed up right on time, only to find out that I didn't have a desk...or office...or really anything but a computer. No phone. No supplies. And my boss would be kind of busy for the next three days and unable to spend much time with me.
 
Rough start.
 
The thing that will make or break your new team member's experience isn't the first year or the first six months. It's not even the first 90 days. It's the first 72 hours.Here's how to crush it so that their engagement is through the roof and they're committed for the long-term:
 
Start with the Basics
Where's the bathroom? Where do I park? And where do I put my lunch?
 
Nothing is more important on day one than these basic needs (see: Maslow's hierarchy). Yet, as managers we tend to think "the only way to learn is to just dive in! There will be time for all the small stuff later." This couldn't be more backwards. Every person has a desire to have their basic needs met, and until that happens you won't get 100% focus from them.
 
ACTION: Start the day by spending a good chunk of time – 60-90 minutes – showing them the following:

• Parking
• The kitchen
• Where the restroom is located
• Any door codes
• The typical work schedule
• The layout of the office
• Any other entrances
• Their office
• Their computer and how to log in
• Their phone and how to access/change voicemail

The Four W's
Once the basics are out of the way, dive into the Four W’s: why, who, what, and…win.
 
1. Hit The “Why”
People want to be inspired. They want to feel like they're a part of something bigger than themselves. Thus, after basic needs are met, the next most important conversation is a super big picture overview of "The Why" -- why does the organization exist and why is their role integral to its success.
 
ACTION: Give history, tell stories, and raise the stakes. Regardless of their role, they should walk away feeling like their work is the most important work to make the organization run. Ask them about their "why" and connect it to your own and the organization's. This conversation should take a solid hour, and may even include some videos, people dropping in to tell their story, and/or other organizational artifacts.
 
Hungry Yet?
Quick sidebar: at this point you should be starving. Take your new employee to lunch and get to know them on a deeper level. At some point, share with them your User’s Guide to Self. What’s that? It’s simply a nifty document you’ll create that outlines everything they might be interested in knowing about you, your personality, and the way you work. It’s the Cliff Notes for working with you. Walk them through it, explaining your nuances, quirks, and expectations, then challenge them to come to your check-in in a week having done the same. This is an easy win for them and a great opportunity to reflect and get to know them better.
 
2. Now Hit the “Who”
Now that their basic needs are met and they see where they fit in the grand scheme, your new team member wants to feel connected to the people. They want to feel like they're a part of the team. The smartest managers will find ample ways to build connection in the first few days, because the more connected the new team member feels the more authentic they will be.
 
ACTION: Draw out on a whiteboard or other piece of paper their constellation of important contacts.

• Putting them in a small circle in the center, draw short lines out from them representing their LEVEL ONE contacts -- those constituents and stakeholders that are directly tied to their day-to-day work. This should include you (the manager), their direct reports, and any other daily contacts.
• Now draw slightly longer lines representing their LEVEL TWO contacts. These include their teammates on their larger team and others they might have contact with on a weekly basis.
• Lastly, draw the longest lines for LEVEL THREE contacts. These individuals are nice-to-know but not urgent for the immediate work. These might be higher-level organizational contacts, vendors, or other constituents with whom they should have occasional, but important, contact.
• Now provide them with email addresses for all LEVEL ONE contacts and charge them with spending the afternoon emailing those folks to introduce themselves. They may cc: you on the email if you desire. The email should follow this flow:
  • Hi _____, My name is _______ and I'm the new _______. {Insert background}. I look forward to meeting you! Sincerely, _______
  • NOTE: You may also have them arrange meetings with these people for the end of the week or week two in order to begin to learn and build connection. This may sound like, “I’d love to set up a time to connect with you for 30 minutes to learn about what you do and where our work might overlap.”
  • They could then follow the same routine for LEVEL TWO and THREE contacts later that week or the following week.

NOTE: This most likely will be the end of Day One. Give them time in the afternoon to get settled, set up their space, and email their contacts.
 
3. It’s Finally About the “What”
Too quickly we want to start here: “here’s what you do, now go and learn to do it.” Skipping the Basics, the Why, and the Who undermines the What. Only after you do those first things is it time to lay out the job. The key here is to identify the main buckets of the job and the most important priorities now.
 
ACTION: Visually depict the main buckets of the job. Then, identify the top three most urgent and important priorities today so the new team member knows where to focus their effort.
 
4. The Last W isn’t When, It’s “Win”
That’s right, WIN. You want the new team member to experience a win in their first week, and ideally in their first few days. They need to feel successful and like they are contributing. Otherwise, they may begin to feel unproductive and like they are receiving more than they are giving. Find something that they can accomplish in a short time frame and set them loose to do it. The win builds momentum and helps them feel centered and valuable.
 
ACTION: Identify a task within their current 3-5 priorities that needs to be accomplished now. It needs to be valuable and not busy work. Pay special attention to assigning a task that is already within their capacity to accomplish. For example, my former manager asked me to lead a teambuilder for a large event in the first three days. This was simple for me, energizing, and helped me show my value. Lastly, be directive, telling them exactly what you want them to do and what the outcome should look like. Let them determine the how and watch them “wow” you.
 
Follow-up Like a Boss
Congrats. You made it through the first three days and their engagement is high. Don’t let off the gas. Remember:

• Weeks 2 and 3 should be focused on them reaching out to their LEVEL TWO and THREE contacts
• Follow-up in your week 2 check-in to find out the following:
  • What has been most energizing?
  • What have they enjoyed the most?
  • When have they come alive?
  • What have they learned?
  • What questions remain?
• Hold them accountable to creating their own “User’s Guide to Self”

​Need more help? Let's talk. I'm all about people starting off with a BANG!

​In research conducted among hospital custodians by Amy Wrzesniewski of the Yale School of Management, she found two different groups of workers: the majority who saw their job as a "dirty job" that was necessary to earn an income, and a small group who saw it as something more.

Way more.

To the point that one custodian saw herself as a "healer," someone who creates a clean and sterile environment that inspires patients and encourages healing.

Wow.

What was the difference between the two? Their mindset, their approach to work and, you guessed it, the outcomes they achieved.

This made me think: how do you see you work? Are you "just" a teacher? An administrator? A dean or manager or secretary?

I know I'm more than a consultant. I'm a "maximizer of human potential," and that makes all the difference in the way I approach my work.

The custodian example came from this powerful article about one of my favorite topics: job crafting. In job crafting, you do the same tasks but in a different way, changing either the process, the people you interact with, or the way you see the task altogether. The end results are higher satisfaction and more meaning, and often better outcomes.

Instead of seeing bus duty as "getting kids on the bus in an orderly fashion" you approach it as a competition, an opportunity to build relationships, or an experiment to test out different methods on a daily basis for streamlining the process. The buses don't change, nor do the students. But the task takes on new meaning, thereby increasing your engagement and, often, the satisfaction of the constituents involved.

You could simply attend your meetings, or you could use them as an opportunity to practice reading nonverbal cues, tracking them on a separate sheet of paper to increase your emotional intelligence. You could be intentional about who you sit next to, and make it your mission to learn more about them and develop trust. Or you could practice listening empathically. Suddenly, meetings are more than a duty.

Job crafting is the key to loving your work without having to leave it.

See, most people I coach believe there is something better "out there" than what's right in front of them. Sometimes that's true. But often, like most of the time, what's needed is a mindset shift -- a RESET.

Last March, I wrote "RESET: How to Get Paid and Love What You Do" and people mistakenly took it for a book about changing careers.

My bad.

It's definitely that, but it's more than that. It's about the concept of reframing your work and approaching it from a new angle that incorporates your greatest asset -- YOU. It's about getting clear about who you are and bringing that to what you do, and reaping the rewards of congruence.

So change the way you approach your work and take control of your satisfaction. Here are the first basic steps:

1. Pick a task.
2. Explore how you could reframe it in one of three ways:

• Task Crafting (changing the activities involved in your job by taking on more or fewer tasks, expanding or diminishing the scope of tasks, or altering the way you perform tasks.)
• Relational Crafting (changing the extent or nature of your interactions with other people. Altering who you do it with, to, or for.)
• Cognitive Crafting (changing the way you think about the purpose of tasks, relationships, or the job as a whole.)

3. Test it out. What was the outcome?

If you want to take your job crafting to ninja level, create a Profile of Self and figure out how to weave your values, strengths, and environments into formerly mundane or monotonous tasks.

My guess is you'll find greater satisfaction from simply attempting to job craft.

From the article: "Whatever your disposition, actively working to hone your job into something nearer to your heart can increase satisfaction at work."

I recently had a good friend take a long-needed sabbatical. We met for lunch and he asked me what I would do if I had some time off. I told him I’d block an afternoon, probably get out in nature, and work through one of my favorite activities.
 
It’s called the Wheel of Life.
 
The concept is simple: complete the wheel per the instructions, step back, and look at your wheel. Much like a car tire, if any area is flatter than the others, the wheelwon’t spin.
 
See, most leaders become ineffective because an area of their “whole self” is neglected, underdeveloped, or weakened by circumstance. They try to leave behind the broken area or bury it when they show up to work. The reality is, you can’t be congruent and authentic by neglecting a major aspect of your identity.
 
The way back to authenticity – and higher satisfaction – is to give more attention and energy to deficient areas of the Wheel. Or, at the very least, to acknowledge weak areas and accept them for what they are for the time being.
 
As Dave Ramsey says, “People who are broken or hurting can’t work hard.” We’ve got to pay attention to the whole person, and that starts with the leader.
 
Try it yourself. Click here to access the Wheel.
 
This is the perfect time of year for some introspection. Take advantage of it and get clear about where you are so that you can set some goals for the new year to get you where you’d like to be.

Awhile back I was coaching a leader who delegated a major assignment to a team member and it went horribly wrong.

"What happened?" I asked.

"She didn't do it," he sighed. "I told her she was in charge of making it happen and to let me know if she needed help. The whole thing fell apart."

"What did you do?" I asked.

"I confronted her and told her she didn't meet expectations," he said.

"Then what?" I asked.

"Well, I can't trust her anymore and can't afford for it to be done poorly, so I just do it myself."

Cue management meltdown.
 
You may have experienced a similar thing. Perhaps it was delegating lesson plan development, lunch or bus duty, tutorials, after-school programming, and so on. In fact, this is one of the most common management dilemmas I coach people on: What do you do when you’ve delegated and it falls through?
 
The first thing to consider – brace yourself – is that 99% of the time the problem starts with you.
 
I know, I know. It can’t be you. You’re diligent, focused, and always communicate clearly. Me too.
 
And yet, the research shows quite the opposite. Successful leaders embrace this maxim:
 
“A good leader takes a little more than his share of the blame, a little less than his share of the credit.” -Arnold H. Glasow
 
When a team member fails to perform, it’s on the leader for not effectively activating that team member. What's activating? It's essentially setting them up with everything they need to be successful.
 
See, people don’t drive to work thinking, “Today I’ll wreak some havoc, drop the ball, and be really bad at what I do.”
 
And yet most of the people I coach who struggle with effective activation point the finger outward. “I don’t know why they won’t do what they’re supposed to. They’re just deviant.”
 
People want to feel successful at work. They want to be good at what they do. They want to be praised for what they do.
 
Start with this assumption.
 
Assuming, then, that all people want to be good at what they do, why don’t they do it?
 
Typically it’s because they don’t know what to do, how to do it, or why they are doing it.
 
Enter effective activation, which looks like this:

1. Tell them why they’re doing it
2. Tell them what they’re going to do
3. Show them how to do it
4. Let them try
5. Observe them doing it
6. Praise their progress or reset to steps 1-3 if they still aren’t doing it

Regardless of the type of assignment, the process is the same. Sell the vision, tell them what, show them how, then set them free to do it. Observe, provide feedback, rinse and repeat.

Effective activation doesn't just set them up for success. It is also a long-term investment in your sanity. You can't afford not to do it.

So what's your next step? Well...

1. Leadership is all about empowering others to take responsibility. Imagine what life will be like when you let go of more stuff, empower others, and get better results!
2. Here's what I need you to do: Start delegating. Today.
3. How? Start by choosing an assignment that you plan to delegate at your next check-in. Then map it out using the six steps above. How will you sell the why? Explain the what? Show them how?
4 & 5. Now go do it and let me know how it went so that I can...
6. Praise you for being an awesome leader!

See what I did there?